OMG! WTF? LOL!
Is this Morse code?
No.
Some new Pharmaceutical ad campaign?
No.
A new kind of alien language?
Well, yes.
This little tidbit of information was brought to you by me, who just completed a semester at a local community college, or better known as, fifteen weeks in thirteenth grade.
Yes, fifteen weeks in thirteenth grade (now known as 15w13g, LOL) was quite the campaign by yours truly. Here I was, navigating thru a student body that was so strange, yet, seemed so familiar. After all these years, I was now on the OUTSIDE looking IN on these kids who probably looked at me with the same amount of perplexity as I did at them. Here are a few observations;
- Skinny Jeans can be worn by girls and guys. Back in the middle 1980s, this was all the rage. I know because as a musician, I did wear them (sadly). Then grunge came in and mercifully killed the look. Why it’s been reborn is anyone’s guess.
- ‘Heathers’ do exist.
- Every kid there is more important than you.
- Every kid would rather be somewhere else.
When you take a step back and look at it, community college is really just thirteenth grade. Most the kids know one another and it’s almost like a reunion of sorts, except they really are only one year (more like three months) removed from hanging out in high school. Whether or not they continue their education, all I know is that I will never wear skinny jeans again and my thumbs cannot text as fast as them. Maybe I really wanted to be someplace else just like them (like a job that I really like).
Friday, May 20, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Lost on Campus
Ok, ok, I know you all have a lot of questions regarding my sabbatical from this hobby called ‘blogging’ and the silly point of view that I have toward job-hunting. In all actually, I really had nothing to write about unless you call painting every upstairs room in my house blog-worthy. But I’m sure what you really want to know is, where have I been since Thursday, September 2, 2010? (aka, the date of my last blog entry).
Well, many events have taken place since that time but none more important than what happened today.
I went back to school.
Yes, school. Just so you know it’s not ‘Harvard’ or ‘Stanford’, or even an Adult Education night class held in a cafeteria at a local middle school. No, it is just ‘community’ college. Community is actually Latin for ‘really inexpensive’.
Say it with me – ka-moon-e-tea.
Excellent.
I’m attending a local community college to finish a Graphic Design degree that I started way back in the early 1990’s. We all remember the nineties, right? Well, here I am in 2011 back at school fighting my way through the North Face jacket wearing, iPod listening, two thumbs a texting, I’m cooler than you because I was born when you were in college, crowd. A fellow student actually called me “Sir” the other day.
Really? ‘Sir’? Ugh.
Talk about culture shock. Might be time to get a North Face jacket and take a black Sharpie to my grey beard (not really).
I am taking four classes at the local community college; Art History, Drawing I, 2-D Design, and English Comp II, and I’ve gotten lost looking for one of my class rooms at least six times. I’m hoping that once I’m done with about three semesters of classes, I can join the hearty folks of the working class. By then I should know my way around the campus.
Graduating with a degree in Design I hope will propel me into a fancy Art Director position with a nice window view and free coffee or working for a local t-shirt company. Either way, I’ll be in a cool creative environment (Hey, ya gotta dream it!).
I have been blaming the Universe for sending me on this crazy route in hopes of finding joyful employment and, moving forward, I will continue to blame the Universe for sending me on this crazy route in hopes of finding ANY kind of employment.
But in the meantime, I have a quiz about poetry next week and need to study the material. I’m betting that there is not one poem on the syllabus that starts with “There was a man from Nantucket…”
Hey look, I see that North Face jackets are on sale! (Man, I really need to get out of the house more often).
More to follow.
Well, many events have taken place since that time but none more important than what happened today.
I went back to school.
Yes, school. Just so you know it’s not ‘Harvard’ or ‘Stanford’, or even an Adult Education night class held in a cafeteria at a local middle school. No, it is just ‘community’ college. Community is actually Latin for ‘really inexpensive’.
Say it with me – ka-moon-e-tea.
Excellent.
I’m attending a local community college to finish a Graphic Design degree that I started way back in the early 1990’s. We all remember the nineties, right? Well, here I am in 2011 back at school fighting my way through the North Face jacket wearing, iPod listening, two thumbs a texting, I’m cooler than you because I was born when you were in college, crowd. A fellow student actually called me “Sir” the other day.
Really? ‘Sir’? Ugh.
Talk about culture shock. Might be time to get a North Face jacket and take a black Sharpie to my grey beard (not really).
I am taking four classes at the local community college; Art History, Drawing I, 2-D Design, and English Comp II, and I’ve gotten lost looking for one of my class rooms at least six times. I’m hoping that once I’m done with about three semesters of classes, I can join the hearty folks of the working class. By then I should know my way around the campus.
Graduating with a degree in Design I hope will propel me into a fancy Art Director position with a nice window view and free coffee or working for a local t-shirt company. Either way, I’ll be in a cool creative environment (Hey, ya gotta dream it!).
I have been blaming the Universe for sending me on this crazy route in hopes of finding joyful employment and, moving forward, I will continue to blame the Universe for sending me on this crazy route in hopes of finding ANY kind of employment.
But in the meantime, I have a quiz about poetry next week and need to study the material. I’m betting that there is not one poem on the syllabus that starts with “There was a man from Nantucket…”
Hey look, I see that North Face jackets are on sale! (Man, I really need to get out of the house more often).
More to follow.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
End of Summer Unemployment Blues
So, here we are at the beginning of the end – the ‘beginning’ is the long Labor Day weekend and the ‘end’ is the official end of the 2010 summer (although we all know we will certainly have our share of 90 degree plus days right up till mid October).
Recently the job search has been put on the back burner as A) its summer and anyone who is in charge of making any sort of decision is sitting on a beach chair somewhere dreading that they have to go back to the office to make any sort of decision, and B) duh, its summer. I did manage to get out a few resumes to the employed world, and I did sneak in a good networking breakfast with a few friends but here’s the real reason I’ve been slacking recently – my five year old daughter has had a two week break between the end of day care and the beginning of kindergarten. There’s that whole ‘beginning’ and ‘end’ theory again.
So, to fill the time, my daughter and I have been doing a lot fun things, like, watching a lot of Phineas and Ferb, riding our Razor scooters (yes, I have the adult version of the Razor Scooter also known as the A5 – it rocks!), going to the Children’s Museum followed by a trip to Micky D’s for a Happy Meal and then to the backyard to kick the soccer ball for a while.
And on those days when she was off on a play date, I painted the bathroom (a cool blue called Blue Moon), cut the grass, did the laundry, watched Phineas and Ferb (hey, it's pretty funny), built my daughters Barbie Dream House for her fifth birthday present as well as assembled the Zhu Zhu hamster tunnels. Then I added more idiotic apps on my smartphone (why?) all the while perusing the websites Monster.com and Indeed.com.
Ok, I’m guessing that after this long holiday weekend and next week, after I put my daughter on the bus for her first day of kindergarten, I will sober up (seriously) and get cranking on my job search. My unemployment is coming to an end and I will have to apply for an extension but I would rather be working. On the other hand, my volunteer work at the Seeing Eye is still happening, so if nothing else, it gets me out of the house.
Yeah, I was laid off back in May but overall I’ve had a good summer with the family. Thank you Universe for letting me have the ‘summer off’. But, we need to get going on that job search – see you the first week of September!
Recently the job search has been put on the back burner as A) its summer and anyone who is in charge of making any sort of decision is sitting on a beach chair somewhere dreading that they have to go back to the office to make any sort of decision, and B) duh, its summer. I did manage to get out a few resumes to the employed world, and I did sneak in a good networking breakfast with a few friends but here’s the real reason I’ve been slacking recently – my five year old daughter has had a two week break between the end of day care and the beginning of kindergarten. There’s that whole ‘beginning’ and ‘end’ theory again.
So, to fill the time, my daughter and I have been doing a lot fun things, like, watching a lot of Phineas and Ferb, riding our Razor scooters (yes, I have the adult version of the Razor Scooter also known as the A5 – it rocks!), going to the Children’s Museum followed by a trip to Micky D’s for a Happy Meal and then to the backyard to kick the soccer ball for a while.
And on those days when she was off on a play date, I painted the bathroom (a cool blue called Blue Moon), cut the grass, did the laundry, watched Phineas and Ferb (hey, it's pretty funny), built my daughters Barbie Dream House for her fifth birthday present as well as assembled the Zhu Zhu hamster tunnels. Then I added more idiotic apps on my smartphone (why?) all the while perusing the websites Monster.com and Indeed.com.
Ok, I’m guessing that after this long holiday weekend and next week, after I put my daughter on the bus for her first day of kindergarten, I will sober up (seriously) and get cranking on my job search. My unemployment is coming to an end and I will have to apply for an extension but I would rather be working. On the other hand, my volunteer work at the Seeing Eye is still happening, so if nothing else, it gets me out of the house.
Yeah, I was laid off back in May but overall I’ve had a good summer with the family. Thank you Universe for letting me have the ‘summer off’. But, we need to get going on that job search – see you the first week of September!
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
All Hail the Pointy Headstock
You will notice that title of my latest blog post is somewhat deceiving. I mean, you were probably all ready to read something about my latest networking magic or some job hunting moxie. Well, today’s post is going to be a tad more selfish (although, all the other posts have been about me so they could be considered selfish as well). Today I’ll be writing about a true love. Yes, the pointy headstock bass guitar.
Let me explain.
When I was a young pup growing up in a very musical household, I tried several musical instruments before I settled on playing the bass. There was the one week intensive playing drums, the occasional noodling on the acoustic guitar, the three hour piano lesson and finally the concentrated six month banjo dream (somehow, Deep Purple’s Smoke on the Water just didn’t sound as cool on a banjo as it did on the low E string of a guitar).
My oldest bother played drums; my other older brother played the guitar so they encouraged me to pick up the bass so we could be like the Partridge Family but on mushrooms. I was soon hooked (on the playing bass not mushrooms) and off to the bedroom to practice I went.
My first two basses we OK (an old 70s Kramer bass with an aluminum neck and then a pearl white Aria bass – hey I was totally digging on John Taylor from Duran Duran at the time!) and they were adequate for playing the occasional Judas Priest or AC/DC song; but something was missing.
I longed for a pointy headstock bass.
In the 1980s, you could not swing a bottle of Aqua Net without hitting a pointy headstock guitar. They were everywhere. It was March of 1986 when I first wandered into that Sam Ash music store in Paramus and low and behold my eyes were transfixed on a beautiful black pointy headstock bass hanging on the wall. I flipped my frosted glam metal hair out of my eyes while my cut off RATT concert shirt barely clung to my 98 lb body over my ridiculous cut up acid wash jeans and white untied wrestling sneakers (come on, we were all there at some point!) as she hung on the wall in all of her black high gloss glory – a double cut away body with a P/J pick up configuration, a rosewood fingerboard and then the wonderful black pointy headstock. I was hooked. After some careful negotiation about the value of my trade in (the Aria bass - sorry!) and the amount of cash I was to pony up, she came home with me and we bonded.
Wow.
Over the last 24 years, me and that pointy headstock bass played gigs in dorm rooms, apartments, dive bars, outdoor BBQ’s, New York City, gymnasiums, honky-tonks, Staten Island, Philadelphia, strip bars, Halloween parties, Friday nights, Saturday nights, two dollar beer night, New Years Eve parties, one US Army base, three dollar Kamikaze night, one art gallery opening, Sunday afternoons, freshman orientation night, the night before Thanksgiving night, narrowly missed opening for Quiet Riot night,… whew! The list goes on.
As the years went by, I gravitated to other basses but she was always there waiting to come out and play but she was in need of some major repairs. This year I finally got her spruced up and ready for action. I got her a new neck, cleaned her up and now she is competing with my other basses to get out. It’s like she never left. She is totally broken in, scratched up, beaten down and yet still sounds great. In all the years we played together, she never once let me down.
Welcome home pointy head stock bass. I can’t wait to talk about you when I finally land a new job.
Let me explain.
When I was a young pup growing up in a very musical household, I tried several musical instruments before I settled on playing the bass. There was the one week intensive playing drums, the occasional noodling on the acoustic guitar, the three hour piano lesson and finally the concentrated six month banjo dream (somehow, Deep Purple’s Smoke on the Water just didn’t sound as cool on a banjo as it did on the low E string of a guitar).
My oldest bother played drums; my other older brother played the guitar so they encouraged me to pick up the bass so we could be like the Partridge Family but on mushrooms. I was soon hooked (on the playing bass not mushrooms) and off to the bedroom to practice I went.
My first two basses we OK (an old 70s Kramer bass with an aluminum neck and then a pearl white Aria bass – hey I was totally digging on John Taylor from Duran Duran at the time!) and they were adequate for playing the occasional Judas Priest or AC/DC song; but something was missing.
I longed for a pointy headstock bass.
In the 1980s, you could not swing a bottle of Aqua Net without hitting a pointy headstock guitar. They were everywhere. It was March of 1986 when I first wandered into that Sam Ash music store in Paramus and low and behold my eyes were transfixed on a beautiful black pointy headstock bass hanging on the wall. I flipped my frosted glam metal hair out of my eyes while my cut off RATT concert shirt barely clung to my 98 lb body over my ridiculous cut up acid wash jeans and white untied wrestling sneakers (come on, we were all there at some point!) as she hung on the wall in all of her black high gloss glory – a double cut away body with a P/J pick up configuration, a rosewood fingerboard and then the wonderful black pointy headstock. I was hooked. After some careful negotiation about the value of my trade in (the Aria bass - sorry!) and the amount of cash I was to pony up, she came home with me and we bonded.
Wow.
Over the last 24 years, me and that pointy headstock bass played gigs in dorm rooms, apartments, dive bars, outdoor BBQ’s, New York City, gymnasiums, honky-tonks, Staten Island, Philadelphia, strip bars, Halloween parties, Friday nights, Saturday nights, two dollar beer night, New Years Eve parties, one US Army base, three dollar Kamikaze night, one art gallery opening, Sunday afternoons, freshman orientation night, the night before Thanksgiving night, narrowly missed opening for Quiet Riot night,… whew! The list goes on.
As the years went by, I gravitated to other basses but she was always there waiting to come out and play but she was in need of some major repairs. This year I finally got her spruced up and ready for action. I got her a new neck, cleaned her up and now she is competing with my other basses to get out. It’s like she never left. She is totally broken in, scratched up, beaten down and yet still sounds great. In all the years we played together, she never once let me down.Welcome home pointy head stock bass. I can’t wait to talk about you when I finally land a new job.
(BTW, that is me playing the pointy headstock bass somewhere, I think in 1989, I think. Maybe it was 1991... Just not sure...)
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Volunteer to Volunteer
As part of my networking process, it was suggested that maybe ‘volunteering’ would be a great way to network. Well, there have been too many days of sitting in front of my laptop, breathing the recycled air while staring at the refrigerator – time to get out. So, to up the ante on my networking, I recently applied to volunteer at the head quarters of the Seeing Eye, a dog training facility in Morristown, that trains Labrador Retrievers and German Sheppard’s to be guide dogs.
And, they said Yes!
Now, you just don’t volunteer at a place like the Seeing Eye and expect to get a cushy volunteer gig, just doesn’t work that way. My first day was grocery shopping. Yes, grocery shopping. The Seeing Eye brings in 24 brand new ‘students’ every five months to train them with their new guide dog and sometimes there are certain items that the students wish to have. That’s where I come in. I met Carl, the head of Hospitality (who is a wonderful guy) and he gave me a food and beverage list. Having had experienced being a Stay at Home Dad for a year, I felt I was perfect for the job. Carl handed me the list, wished me luck and off I went. I was buying things like deodorant, spiffy toothpaste, alcohol and the occasional bag of Muncho’s.
Got it all.
I did have to go to three different places but it was worth it. The highlight of the excursion was when I was returning – As I was driving back to the HQ, I saw trainers and guide dogs with their new students walking for the first time in our little busy town. It was awesome. I felt really good about giving back. Well, it went so smoothly, that they have asked me to come back in a few Mondays to do it all over again. I absolutely agreed. It did make me stop and wonder though – here I am, unemployed and looking for work and these folks are just trying to get through their day. And now, with the assistance of a new guide dog, life should be easier.
Glad to see that the Universe is taking care of some folks who could use it.
And, they said Yes!
Now, you just don’t volunteer at a place like the Seeing Eye and expect to get a cushy volunteer gig, just doesn’t work that way. My first day was grocery shopping. Yes, grocery shopping. The Seeing Eye brings in 24 brand new ‘students’ every five months to train them with their new guide dog and sometimes there are certain items that the students wish to have. That’s where I come in. I met Carl, the head of Hospitality (who is a wonderful guy) and he gave me a food and beverage list. Having had experienced being a Stay at Home Dad for a year, I felt I was perfect for the job. Carl handed me the list, wished me luck and off I went. I was buying things like deodorant, spiffy toothpaste, alcohol and the occasional bag of Muncho’s.
Got it all.
I did have to go to three different places but it was worth it. The highlight of the excursion was when I was returning – As I was driving back to the HQ, I saw trainers and guide dogs with their new students walking for the first time in our little busy town. It was awesome. I felt really good about giving back. Well, it went so smoothly, that they have asked me to come back in a few Mondays to do it all over again. I absolutely agreed. It did make me stop and wonder though – here I am, unemployed and looking for work and these folks are just trying to get through their day. And now, with the assistance of a new guide dog, life should be easier.
Glad to see that the Universe is taking care of some folks who could use it.
Friday, July 23, 2010
The Follow Up
So, I reached out to a former co-worker to see how the old company I worked for is doing. Tam Aznod is still sitting in a cube, wearing pleated khakis’ and wishing he was someplace else. I’ve changed Tam’s name to protect his cube position. Here is an excerpt of the conversation:
Me – Hey Tam, how’s it going?
Tam (whispering) – Hey man, I can’t really talk, I’m on a call campaign to all my clients…
Me – OK, I’ll let you go. I was just checking in to see what’s happening.
Tam (still whispering) – nothing’s changed here. I still sit in this God forsaken cube, wearing a headset, talking to people who don’t want to talk to me. It’s horrible. If nothing else, at least the coffee is free…
Me – Bummer man…
Tam – Yeah, you think you’re miserable sitting at home trying to figure out your next career move, try coming back here and wearing a fake smile, and pressed pants. Who knew I had to match my socks with my belt?
Me – I’m wearing a pair of shorts right now…
Tam - You suck...
Me - Anyway, how are Laurie (Laurie Broadway) and Mickey (Mickey VicShane) doing?
Tam (still whispering) – They are miserable as well, wait hold on (Tam changes his voice) That’s right sir, it’s Tam Aznod calling, I was calling in regards to……. that’s right,….. yes, from the corporate office,….. and…… (Tam starts to whisper again) whew,… that was close, our new Senior VP just walked by, I hope he bought it, you still there?
Me – I’m still here. Look you sound somewhat busy…
Tam – Yeah kinda, these call campaigns are so bothersome that I can’t even play Bejewelded anymore…
Me – Well, tell everyone I said ‘hi’ and…
Tam – I will, hey man, be happy you got this chance to sort your career out. Its way too tough to do it while you’re in a call campaign having people yell at you over the phone. And I cannot express how much I can’t stand sitting in a cube. Gotta go! Let’s have lunch!
Well, Tam and I and the rest of the gang are going to have lunch to commiserate on corporate cube sitting. It really won’t be a networking gig but it will sure be fun.
Take that Universe….
Me – Hey Tam, how’s it going?
Tam (whispering) – Hey man, I can’t really talk, I’m on a call campaign to all my clients…
Me – OK, I’ll let you go. I was just checking in to see what’s happening.
Tam (still whispering) – nothing’s changed here. I still sit in this God forsaken cube, wearing a headset, talking to people who don’t want to talk to me. It’s horrible. If nothing else, at least the coffee is free…
Me – Bummer man…
Tam – Yeah, you think you’re miserable sitting at home trying to figure out your next career move, try coming back here and wearing a fake smile, and pressed pants. Who knew I had to match my socks with my belt?
Me – I’m wearing a pair of shorts right now…
Tam - You suck...
Me - Anyway, how are Laurie (Laurie Broadway) and Mickey (Mickey VicShane) doing?
Tam (still whispering) – They are miserable as well, wait hold on (Tam changes his voice) That’s right sir, it’s Tam Aznod calling, I was calling in regards to……. that’s right,….. yes, from the corporate office,….. and…… (Tam starts to whisper again) whew,… that was close, our new Senior VP just walked by, I hope he bought it, you still there?
Me – I’m still here. Look you sound somewhat busy…
Tam – Yeah kinda, these call campaigns are so bothersome that I can’t even play Bejewelded anymore…
Me – Well, tell everyone I said ‘hi’ and…
Tam – I will, hey man, be happy you got this chance to sort your career out. Its way too tough to do it while you’re in a call campaign having people yell at you over the phone. And I cannot express how much I can’t stand sitting in a cube. Gotta go! Let’s have lunch!
Well, Tam and I and the rest of the gang are going to have lunch to commiserate on corporate cube sitting. It really won’t be a networking gig but it will sure be fun.
Take that Universe….
Friday, July 16, 2010
Holiday Week
This post was delayed due to a vacation, so I apologize for the lateness - So, I will admit that this was indeed a bad week for networking. When a major holiday comes rolling in, it seems like everyone (myself included) gets sucked into the hilarity of it all and completely shuts down. I am one of those folks and I am guilty as charged. Well, the July Fourth one day holiday suddenly became the July Fourth four day holiday weekend. July Fourth landed on a Sunday so most companies gave Friday July Second off as well as Monday July Fifth off. This all made me a tad bitter as I wished I had all those days off as well (wait a minute, who am I kidding!?) I know, I know, people kept telling me that I’m so lucky to be home, and “that’s awesome that you have the time to find what you want and…”
Ok. I get it.
I do know I have this great opportunity to ‘find myself’ so to speak but it’s not like going to Stop and Shop to get some buttermilk waffles (two for $4.00 today with your Stop and Shop card!) and a couple plain vanilla yogurts (I like yogurt, really!), it really is a bit tougher. Then there are more hiccups thrown at you (but this one is a good hiccup) - Today, I went with my daughter on their school field trip to the Turtle Back Zoo. Talk about insanity! 32 five year olds wearing neon green shirts dodging rain drops and goose poop trying to watch the penguins eat sardines. It was awesome! And for a few hours I didn’t really care if I networked or not. I left drenched and happy. My one observation about the zoo was that they put the red tailed hawks habitat directly across the way from the prairie dog home; now, isn’t that a bit insensitive toward the Hawks? I mean, they must be going crazy watching those brown varmints running around freely without a care while they are in a twenty four by twenty four foot square cage with NO CHANCE of grabbing one for breakfast.
Like I said, strictly an observation, and here I was thinking that the Universe was playing tricks on me….
There’s always another chance to network tomorrow.
Ok. I get it.
I do know I have this great opportunity to ‘find myself’ so to speak but it’s not like going to Stop and Shop to get some buttermilk waffles (two for $4.00 today with your Stop and Shop card!) and a couple plain vanilla yogurts (I like yogurt, really!), it really is a bit tougher. Then there are more hiccups thrown at you (but this one is a good hiccup) - Today, I went with my daughter on their school field trip to the Turtle Back Zoo. Talk about insanity! 32 five year olds wearing neon green shirts dodging rain drops and goose poop trying to watch the penguins eat sardines. It was awesome! And for a few hours I didn’t really care if I networked or not. I left drenched and happy. My one observation about the zoo was that they put the red tailed hawks habitat directly across the way from the prairie dog home; now, isn’t that a bit insensitive toward the Hawks? I mean, they must be going crazy watching those brown varmints running around freely without a care while they are in a twenty four by twenty four foot square cage with NO CHANCE of grabbing one for breakfast.
Like I said, strictly an observation, and here I was thinking that the Universe was playing tricks on me….
There’s always another chance to network tomorrow.
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